There is no way around it, you must become mentally tough. Success hinges on the strength of the mind. When you stick your neck out, criticism and disapproval will surely come. We are not yet living in a utopia full of accepting beautiful souls.

I used to become extremely emotionally attached to people. Everything they said affected me deeply. I cared what others thought. I wanted people to love me.

Fast forward to a national ‘scandal’ where I was in the news on the daily. I was called every name you can imagine. So was my daughter. I took a beating in the blogs and comments. The Today Show’s poll had record breaking participation numbers after our appearance. The world aggressively came against us.

I fell into a depression. I was disagreeable and angry. I felt like my beautiful world had collapsed and I was left with an ugly, sick place to live. This was not a gradual introduction into the world of criticism, this was baptism by fire. Overnight the entire nation was talking negatively about me. People from my home town wrote me asking me to move or kill myself because I was an ‘embarrassment’.

It took some time to gain perspective. The abuse I faced was a reflection of a sick nation. It had nothing to do my beautiful person.

What I found out about myself was I did not want to live on a planet where people put other people down for sport. I was not going to sit by without doing my damnedest to change the spiritual climate. I put myself back in the limelight. I became a spiritual coach, author and public speaker. I did so knowing that haters were always looking for a meal. I knew what it felt like to be on the plate. But this time I had done the hard work of mental self improvement.

In order to handle criticism like a boss you must dedicate yourself to these three things.

Master your thoughts. This is not taught in school. Most of us had dysfunctional parents that did not model healthy practices. I was reading the comments on those blogs. Of course the negativity transferred. I was taking in other peoples poison. Remind yourself of who you really are when faced with criticism. The longer you have been doing personal development work the easier this will become. Subscribe to my Youtube channel. I remind you of your greatness.

Protect your emotions. You do this by monitoring your thoughts. Whatever you think about you have an emotional reaction to. Do not dwell on criticism! Stop it. Do not think about the person who wishes to discourage you. The stronger your mind becomes the more you can disconnect emotionally. No question its going to be harder for a Pisces, Cancer, Scorpio or Leo but with practice you will see how you are in charge of your emotions by the way you train your brain.

Have a mission so solid that nothing can sway you. When you know what it is you are called to do it keeps you facing forward. If there is something in the criticism that will help you grow, use it. Otherwise stay fixated on your dream.

In my book Fashion A Fairytale, An Inspired Methodology For Manifesting Fantasies, I start the series off with Book One, Self Centered. It is imperative to take care of yourself first and foremost. You can heal yourself from anything. Mental power increases with practice. You are capable of becoming so strong that you can face any critic and bounce right back.

Join me on my quest for making this world a more loving, accepting place. When you find yourself being negative or engaging in criticism, remember people are doing the best they can with what they currently know. Head in the opposite direction. Be the person that offers encouragement and support. Refuse to face off with negative energy. Lead in the direction of enlightened behavior.

Let’s create that utopia.

Miki Spies is a spiritual coach. She authored Fashion A Fairytale,  An Inspired Methodology For Manifesting Fantasies and How To Be A SEX GOD, Make Women Worship You. Miki is a motivational speaker, imparting manifesting power.

Miki and her daughter Sydney cofounded SpiesGirls. They produce their own reality show. Watch Miki’s inspired teaching on YouTube. Miki was raised in the mountains of Colorado. Spies currently resides in Holland.